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Article By Mukkarram Saroya

آگاہیادبمعاشرتبصیرتمنتخب تحریریںتازہ ترینپسندیدہ تریناہم ترینتعلیمحالاتِ حاضرہ ملکیحکمترجسٹرلاگ ان
پاکستان میں خواتین کی حالت – مکرم حبیب سرویا
2 days ago
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یونیسف کی ایک رپورٹ کے مطابق پاکستان میں غیر شادی شدہ خواتین کی تعداد ایک کروڑ سے زائد ہے۔
جنکی عمریں 20سے، 35سال کے درمیان ہیں ۔ ان میں سےمیں سے دس لاکھ لڑکیوں کی شادی کی عمر گزر چکی ہے۔
بیوہ و مطلقہ خواتین جنکی عمریں 35سے 45 سال تک ہیں انکی تعداد ساٹھ لاکھ ہے ۔

ان خواتین کے بالوں میں چاندی کب کی اتر چکی ہے کوئ پرسان حال نہیں کہ بیوہ و مطلقہ چکی کے دو پاٹوں میں کسطرح پس رہی ہیں اور کنواریاں کس جہنم میں زندگی بسر کر رہی ہیں۔
کسی کو بطور انسان ان کے مسئلے سے غرض نہیں ۔سب یہ سوچتے ہیں کہ چمن میں آگ لگے لیکن اسکا گھر نہ جلے لیکن ایسا ممکن نہیں آگ اگر گھر تک نہ پہنچے گی تو اسکی تپش ضرور پہنچے گی۔
ہمارے ہاں دوسری شادی اور یا تعدد اذدواج کا شور مچتا ہے بحث و مباحثے ہوتے ہیں لیکن اسکا حل نہیں نکالا جاتا۔ علماء کرام دوسری شادی کے حق میں فتاوی جاری کر تے ہیں لیکن نقار خانے میں طوطی کی آواز کون سنتا ہے پس مسئلہ جوں کا توں رہ جاتا ہے۔
ازل سے دیکھا جائے تو حضرت آدم و حوا کا جوڑا یک زوجگی پر مشتمل تھا اور قرآن میں متعدد مقامات پر فرمایا گیا کہ مرد اور عورت کا جوڑا بنایا گیا ہے۔جو یک زوجگی کی مثال بن جاتا ہے۔
لیکن اس سب کے باوجود انبیاء کرام کی اکثریت کثیرالازواج تھی حضرت ابراہیمؑ کی دو بیویاں سارہ اور ہاجرہ کا تذکرہ ہم پڑھتے ہیں۔ خود حضرت محمدؐ کی ازداوج مطہرات کی تعداد گیارہ اور نو تک رہی ۔
جو کہ نبی صلی اللہ علیہ والہ وسلم کے ساتھ اشاعت اسلام کی ترویج میں مدد گار رہیں ۔
سورہ النساء میں فرمان الہی ہے
فانکحوا ما طاب لکم من النساء مثنی و ثلث و ربع فان خفتم الا تعدلوا فواحدۃ او ما ملکت ایمانکم ذلک ادنای الا تعولوا۔
یعنی ان میں سے دو، تین، چار سے نکاح کر لو پھر اگر ڈر ہو کہ انصاف نہ کر سکو گے تو ایک ہی بیوی پر اکتفا کرو ۔
اب یہ کہا جائے گا یہ چار بیویوں کا حکم اس وقت خاص طور پر نازل کیا گیا کہ خواتین سے نکاح کرو کیونکہ غزوات میں کثرت سے شہادتیں ہورہی تھیں اور بیواؤں اور یتیموں کو تحفظ اور کفالت کی ضرورت تھی۔
لیکن اگر وہ وقت خاص تھا تو وقت آج بھی خاص ہی ہے اور اس حکم کی تعمیل فی زمانہ بھی کی جانی چاہیے۔لیکن جب بھی دوسری شادی کا مسئلہ سر اٹھاتا ہے ایک طوفان بدتمیزی برپا ہو جاتا ہے کہ وہ لوگ جو دوسروں کو شادی کی ترغیب دے رہے ہیں اسکی ابتداء اپنے گھر سے کر کے مثال قائم کریں پھر ہمیں کہیں ، غرض جتنے منہ اتنی باتیں یہ صرف مسئلہ نہیں بلکہ صورت حال خاصی گھمبیر ہے۔
ہم چاہنے کے باوجود اس سے نظر نہیں چرا سکتے۔ معاشرے میں جب کسی چیز کا توازن خراب ہوتا ہے تو وہ دوسرے پلڑے کو بھی الٹا دیتا ہے۔
ہمیں خواتین کو بطور انسان لے کر انکے بنیادی انسانی مسائل کا حل نکالنا ہوگا نہ کہ فریقین ایک دوسرے کو مورد الزام ٹھرائیں کہ ظالم کون ہے اور مظلوم کون ۔
میں ذاتی طور پر بھی نہیں چاہتی کہ کسی کی خانگی زندگی خراب کی جا ئے لیکن اس مسئلے کا حل تو تلاش کرنا ہو گا۔
میرےاس معاشرے کے ہر فرد سے یہ سوالات ہیں کہ اپکے پاس انکے کیا جوابات یا حل ہیں کہ ان عورتوں کا کیا کیا جائے ۔

1۔ کیا ان خواتین کو زندہ درگور کر دیا جائے یا پھر زندہ لاشیں بن کر زندگی گزارنے پر مجبور کرد یا جائے ۔
2 سوال ان خواتین سے کہ وہ شوہروں کی داشتائیں تو برداشت کر لیتی ہیں لیکن سوکن نہیں تو کیا مردوں کو حرام کرنے کی اجازت دے دی جائے یا دوسری شادی کی ۔
3 ۔ کیا ہم اتنے مہذب ہیں کہ خواتین کو اکیلے رہنے دیا جائے اور وہ ہر خوف سے مبراء ہو کر زندگی گزار سکیں۔
4۔کیا ہم ان عورتوں کو اجازت دے دیں کہ وہ مغرب کی طرح بوائے فرینڈ بنا کرزندگی گزار لیں۔

5۔ کیا وہ اہنے اہل خانہ کے لیے مجرموں کی طرح زندگی گزاریں اگر انکی شادیاں نہیں ہوتیں۔

6۔ کیا اہل خانہ ان خواتین کو زندگی کی ضروریات تا عمر بہم پہنچا ئیں گے کہ وہ آسودگی سے جی سکیں ۔
7۔ کیا معاشرے کے اس ترحم آمیز جملے سے بچانے کا کوئ حل ہے کہ اس بیچاری کی شادی نہیں ہوئی ۔

8۔ کیا جواب ہے ہمارے پاس کہ والدین کو اس لڑکی اس تکلیف دہ جملے سے بچا سکیں کہ آپ بیٹیوں کی شادی کیوں نہیں کرتے ۔
9۔کیا کیا جائے کہ ان خواتین سے تین وقت کی روٹی کے بدلے گھریلو امور کی بیگار نہیں لی جائے گی۔
10۔ کیا مرد اکیلی لڑکی کو شرافت سے زندگی گزارنے دیں گے۔
11۔ کیا حل ہے کہ اگر کوئی غیر شادی شدہ خاتون کسی مرد سے گفتگو کر رہی ہو، تو ہم اسکے کردار کو مشکوک نہ کریں گے۔
12۔کیا تجویز ہے کہ یہ خواتین آپ سے اپنی ضرورت کے لیے کچھ نہ مانگیں، آپ دیں بھی نہ اور یہ بھی چاہیں کہ وہ ہمارے گھروں کی عزت کو داغ دار نہ کریں۔

13۔ بشمول مردوزن کیا ان خواتین کو وراثت دے دی جاتی ہے کہ وہ خود کفیل ہو سکیں ۔
14۔ کیا حکومت وقت نے ان خواتین کے لیے ماہانہ وظائف کا بندوبست کیا ہوا ہے کہ وہ بغیر محتاجی کے اپنا خرچہ پورا کرسکیں۔
میں جانتی ہوں کہ سب ان سوالوں سے نظر چرا کر بیسیوں دلائل دیں گے کیونکہ ہم اس مسئلے کی سنگینی کو سمھجتے ہی نہیں ہیں، کیونکہ یہ ہمارے گھر کا مسئلہ ہی نہیں ہے۔حضور یہ جیتے جاگتے انسان ہیں جن کی ضروریات بھی ہیں ۔بت نہیں کہ انکو چپ چپیتے کونے میں ڈال دیا جائے ۔ اور یہ کہا جائےکہ دوسری شادی سے معاشرے میں بگاڑ پیدا ہوگا۔خاندانوں میں انتشار بڑھے گا عائلی زندگی کا سکون برباد ہو گا۔اور اسکے حق میں ہم بہت سی امثال لے آتے ہیں۔
مثلا یہ دلیل دی جاتی ہے کہ حضرت محمدۖ نے حضرت خدیجہ کی زندگی میں دوسری شادی نہیں کی تھی۔انکی وفات کے بعد، دیگر نکاح کیے تھے اور وہ بھی معمر خواتین سے کیا کہیں انکا یہ ارشاد ہے کہ جب تک پہلی بیوی وفات نہ پائے دوسری شادی نہ کی جائے۔آپ نے بیویوں کے درمیان عدل سے کام لیااور، عائلی امور کے ساتھ ساتھ ترویج اسلام بھی انجام دی ۔
جو اس بات کی دلیل ہیں کہ عدل سے کام لے کر یہ حکم قابل عمل ہے۔جب قانون اور ضوابط توڑے جائیں تب انتشار ہوتا ہے ویسے نہیں۔
دوسری دلیل یہ بھی دی جا سکتی ہے کہ حضرت فاطمہؓ کی زندگی میں حضرت علیؓ نے نکاح کرنا چاہا تو آپ نے فرمایا کہ جو فاطمہ کو تکلیف دے گا وہ مجھے بھی تکلیف دے گا۔ تو حضرت علی رک گئے۔لیکن یہ حکم بالخصوص سیدہ کے لیے تھا، کیا آپ نے یہ حکم اسوقت سب کے لیے دیا تھا ۔ ہے کوئ ثبوت اس بات کا۔
فرمان نبویؐ ہے کہ بیوہ اور مطلقہ کی شادی میں جلدی کروتو کیا ہم اس حکم کو خود بخود ساقط کر دیں۔ نہیں کر سکتے۔ تو کیا انکے لیے نکاح ثانی حرام کر دیا جائے ۔
اگر مرد کے لیے اسلام نے شادی کی عمر مقرر نہیں کی تو، عورت کے لیے بھی عمر کی تخصیص نہیں ہے وہ بھی عمر کے کسی بھی حصے میں شادی کر سکتی ہیں ازواج مطہرات کی عمریں ہمارے لیے مثال ہیں ۔

اگر مرد میں چار بیویوں کی کفالت کی استطاعت نہ ہوتی تو چار کا حکم ہی نہ نازل ہوتا۔نہ عموم میں نہ خصوص میں۔
کنفیوشس سے تعدد ازدواج پر سوال کیا، تو اس نے جواب دیا کہ تم ایک چینک کے ساتھ چھ پیالیاں تو دیکھتے ہو کھبی ایک پیالی کے ساتھ چھ چینکیں دیکھی ہیں نہیں تو یہ ہی تمہارے سوال کا جواب ہے کہ ایک مردعورتوں کو تحفظ دے سکتا ہے عورتیں نہیں ۔
اصل زمہ داری مرد پر عائد ہوتی ہے کہ وہ کسطرح عائلی زندگی میں عدل سے کام لیتا ہے۔اور اسکے لیے اسے نبی کریم صلی الله عليه وسلم کی زندگی کو اپنے لیے بطور نمونہ چننا ہو گا۔جس پر وہ چل کر کامیاب زندگی گزار سکتا ہے اور معاشرے میں پر سکون ماحول د ے سکتا ہے ۔ کیونکہ پدر سری معاشرےمیں مرد با اختیار ہے ۔
لیکن اگر دوسری شادی ممکن نہیں مرد عدل سے کام نہیں لے سکتا تو پھر ان خواتین کے لیےسماجی کارکنان اور حکومت کو اقدامات کرنے ہوں گے۔

کیونکہ حکومت بھی انکی ولی ہے ۔ان خواتین کے لیے فی الفور ماہانہ وظائف مقرر کیے جائیں۔تاکہ وہ فکر معاش، سے آزاد ہوں۔شعبہ پرائمری تعلیم میں ان خواتین کو مستقل بنیادوں پر، استاد بھرتی کیا جائے۔یہ ننز کی طرح بہترین معلم ثابت ہوں گی ۔
سماجی امور کی بھلائ کے اداروں میں انہیں کھپایا جائے جہاں پر وہ افراد کی فلاح و بہبود کےلیے ہمہ وقت وقف ہوں گی۔
ان پڑھ خواتین کے لیے مرکز ہنر مندی و دستکاری ۔اور ثقافتی صنعتوں کی بحالی کے ادارے بنائے جائیں جہاں وہ مختلف ہنر سیکھیں ، سکھائیں اور ملکی معیشت کی ترقی میں ہاتھ بٹائیں ۔
عام اداروں میں خواتین کے معاوضے مردوں کے برابر کیے جائیں تاکہ وہ اپنابوجھ خود اٹھا سکیں۔
اور سب سے بڑھ کر خواتین کو سماج میں مکمل تحفظ دینے کے اقدامات کیے جائیں جس سے وہ محفوظ زندگی گزار سکیں ۔
پاکستان میں گلوبل جینڈر گیپ رپورٹ 2018 کے مطابق پاکستان خواتین کو حقوق دینے میں 149ملکوں کی فہرست میں 148نمبر پر آیاہے۔جس سے خواتین کے بنیادی حقوق کی حق تلفی ظاہر ہو رہی ہے ۔
اپنے حقوق کے لیے خواتین کو انفرادی اور اجتماعی طور پر شدیدجد وجہد کی ضرورت ہے ۔
کاش کہ ہم عورتوں کو انسان سمجھ کر انکو انسانی و سماجی حقوق فراہم کر سکیں ۔
لیکن اے بسا، آرزو، کہ خاک شد۔

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